Supporting NK through Domestic Abuse and Empowerment
Client Profile
- Name: NK
- Age:61
- Nationality: Colombian
- Language Proficiency: Limited English
- Technological Proficiency: Computer illiterate
- Marital Status: Divorced
- Health Issues: Diabetes, high blood pressure, arthritis, and depression
Background
NK, a 61-year-old retired woman from Colombia, faced significant challenges due to her limited use of the English language and lack of computer skills. Following a 13-year marriage, she continued to live with her ex-husband due to having no alternative accommodation. NK’s health issues further complicated her situation, making her dependent on her ex-husband, who exerted control over her life in numerous ways.
Initial Challenges
During initial sessions with STN, NK described her ex-husband as a “lunatic with increasing mood changes.” Despite being divorced, he controlled her finances, held her passport and official documents, managed her phone, and claimed benefits on her behalf, keeping the funds for himself. He also restricted her interactions with others and frequently threatened her with physical violence and homelessness. These threats escalated during the pandemic. Additionally, NK’s 30-year-old son, who abused drugs, also mistreated her, stealing money and verbally abusing her alongside his father.
Reaching Out for Help
Living in constant fear, NK confided in a neighbour who was aware of STN’s work through another woman in the community we had helped. After several attempts, we were able to arrange a visit for NK and initiated several crucial steps to aid her:
- Referral to Domestic Violence Services: We referred NK to Redbridge Council’s domestic violence team and the Women’s Aid National Helpline.
- Financial Independence: We helped NK open a new bank account with Monzo Bank, ensuring her finances were separate from her ex-husband. We assisted her in applying for welfare benefits, completed her Universal Credit application online, and accompanied her to the job center to secure her benefits. We also completed a PIP application for her disability benefits.
- Housing Support: We contacted Enfield Council’s homelessness department, completed the necessary forms, and submitted a supporting letter to secure safe accommodation for NK. She successfully obtained refuge through the council, which greatly relieved her as her ex-husband and son were unaware of her new location.
Ongoing Support and Empowerment
To ensure NK’s continued safety and well-being, we provided extensive ongoing support:
- Technological and Educational Support: We provided NK with a tablet and arranged for a volunteer tutor to teach her English, digital skills, and offer befriending services. These training sessions significantly improved her English proficiency and self-esteem.
- Emotional and Pastoral Support: We developed a trusting relationship with NK, giving her hope and confidence. Our continuous support has been crucial in her journey towards independence and empowerment.
Conclusion
Supporting NK required a long-term commitment and extensive follow-up, which mainstream services often lack the capacity to provide. However, our dedicated approach has helped NK transition from a life of fear and control to one of safety and self-sufficiency. She now lives in a secure environment, free from her abusive ex-husband and son, and continues to build her skills and confidence with our support.
NK’s story highlights the importance of comprehensive, compassionate support in helping survivors of domestic abuse reclaim their lives and underscores the vital role of organisations like STN in providing such support.